Author Topic: LOLZ A Twitard tryed to kill me this Morning! LOLZ (13+ for some language) (Read 1259 times)

Lightblackheart · « **on:** October 11, 2009, 03:42:24 PM »

Well guys,I came here and other forums i am right now just to tell the epic win that was this morning.I haven't laughed so hard in my live

and apparently,the bad luck string just ended and it's just epic lols from now on

Ok,heres the thing: I went with my mom and my grandpa this morning at 6:00 AM to the new shopping mall in Caracas.We arrived around 7:15 or so.And we got separated,cuz I wanted to see the comic stores and some other like that,eat something,buy a shirt and yesh,everything you can do in a Shopping Mall.......But there was this Twitard,JUST FOLLOWING ME AROUND.She was just a nerdy type of girl,no fat,no glasses,just brakes and three freaky ponytails.She was wearing this huge blouse with "Twilight" and "Bella and Edward Forever in it".She just followed me into stores,in the restaurants,even when i went to RESTROOM!.

Then,when I didn't see her anywhere,i just went to eat a Hot Dog and then reunite again with my grandpa and my mom....But the girl just was waiting for me in a corner!!.....

She surprised me,and then shouted "JUUUUU AREEEE JJJOUUUUUSSSSTTT LIIIIEEEEEKKK EDDDWAAAAARRRDD!!1!1!1111" while she just spitted all over my face

I was about to run,but the crazy gal pushed me to the wall,all the way shouting sh** like "Do you Sparkle?!","So hot,your eyes are just like hims!","Is the Cullen Family Allright?!!!11!" and after that,he took off my back pack,and opened it,searching it all over for something.

"Don't you read Twilight?" =(

"No" I said.

And then the girl pulled outta nowhere 3 books of Twilight.And she was again spitting and blabbering all over me....And after that,the girl kissed me in the neck,shouting things like she was drain all my blood to live with her forever...

THAT WAS IT.I WAS ALMOST TO RAGE ALL OVER THE PLACE.

"Real vampire don't sparkle!Real vampires are NOT FU**ING PERFECT AND LIVE IN A LUXURY HOUSE!!.BELLA IS JUST A MARY SUE AND EDWARD TOO!!!TRUE LOVE IS NOT ABOUT BEING FOREVER YOUNG OR WATCHING OTHER PEOPLE SLEEP AT NIGHT!! NOT EVEN GETTING A JAILBAIT LIKE BELLA PREGNANT WITH A MONSTER THAT WILL KILL HER!!THE VOLTURIS (or whatever they are named,just heard the name one time) ARE A BAD EXAMPLE OF THE TROPE OF EVIL ORGANIZATION! MEYER FIRST POINT OF VIEW ITS LIKE A CRAPPY HARRY POTTER FIC!!BEING CLUMSY IS NOT A FLAW!!NOT EVEN IT!! FU** THE HELL UP!!! AND STOP STALKING ME! EDWARD IS JUST A FICTION CHARACTER LIKE MOTHERFU**ING NARUTO!!! OR HULK! OR CHARLES CHAPLIN!! SO SHUT THE HELL UP AND LET ME GO!!"

And after that,she gazed at me and broke into tears....And then she raged too...The girl started throwing me the books and shouting "Edward is real!" ALL OVER THE shopping mall.I wan as fast as I can,and one security guard stopped her,the girl started to bite him in the arm and shouting her vampire powers.

After they took her away,the lulz began.I lost almost 10 minutes of my life just laughing at the girl.Yes,I knew some fans of Twilight are extreme,but none like this one.After that,I went to pick up my back pack,I buyed some Yugioh cards in the nearby store and acted like nothing happened.

I just feel bad for the girl right now,she seriously needs Psicological help.

Negi Springfield · « **Reply #1 on:** October 11, 2009, 03:48:18 PM »

Twilight.

Rage · « **Reply #2 on:** October 11, 2009, 03:54:56 PM »

this is funny but . . . . . .

Lightblackheart · « **Reply #3 on:** October 11, 2009, 03:56:03 PM »

Quote from: Chi-Chi on October 11, 2009, 03:48:18 PM

Twilight.

Yes,I am right now checking out in twilightsucks.com (IT EXISTS!!! http://www.twilightsucks.com/ ) If there are more rabid fangirls like this one

Quote from: Rage on October 11, 2009, 03:54:56 PM

this is funny but . . . . . .

yep,funny but a bit sad for the girl.

Rage · « **Reply #4 on:** October 11, 2009, 04:03:07 PM »

Quote from: Lightblackheart on October 11, 2009, 03:56:03 PM

Yes,I am right now checking out in twilightsucks.com (IT EXISTS!!! http://www.twilightsucks.com/ ) If there are more rabid fangirls like this one

yep,funny but a bit sad for the girl.

I wasnt thinking sad for her. I was thinking that this is a bit far fetched but ive been to conventions so it could happen

As for the girl i dont feel sorry for her, i dont know her, and nothing shes doing is effecting my live so i could care less.

Now as for the behavoir, it funny how people get over these things. i laugh most of the time cause its there world only every now and again i hang my head and turn away. Some times i envy these people because some of them dont have to put up with this world.

Demon King EX · « **Reply #5 on:** October 11, 2009, 05:59:37 PM »

that is Kinda Like My Story
But Mine wasnt Twighlight

It was Harry V@$#!

I Mean Harry Potter!.
Your Went Well Compared To Mine
But My Eyes Didnt Look Like Harry Hell I Didnt look Like Harry Just Making Fun Of
him that all!,

KPT25 · « **Reply #6 on:** October 12, 2009, 10:47:03 AM »

i've read comments of broken arms and worse about Twilight fans or how you call them Twi-tards...

Luckily for you,this one turned out to be lulzy...other ppl ended up with their face burnt with acid or with a broken arm or leg...scary and gives bad publicity to the author

x_mad80 · « **Reply #7 on:** October 12, 2009, 10:58:59 AM »

blade is cool

KenFan9276 - Member of CROM · « **Reply #8 on:** October 12, 2009, 11:00:47 AM »

sorry man...
I'm REALLY sorry for that girl though.

KPT25 · « **Reply #9 on:** October 12, 2009, 11:14:59 AM »

Quote from: x_mad80 on October 12, 2009, 10:58:59 AM

blade is cool

ROFL!!!!

That made my day now...

Jelux Da Casual · « **Reply #10 on:** October 12, 2009, 11:24:04 AM »

holy crap man, finally got to read this. That's freaking insane. Was she at least cute?

♦ßlôödÑinjå♦ · « **Reply #11 on:** October 12, 2009, 12:03:05 PM »

You could of at least punched her in the head for kissing your neck.
In all seriousness next time just walk away , you never know.

Random Regular · « **Reply #12 on:** October 12, 2009, 12:33:04 PM »

Hahahahaha, This is pure gold

AceWonder20 · « **Reply #13 on:** October 12, 2009, 01:21:11 PM »

Wow man. Thats an episode there.

Good thing u escaped and she didnt have friends with her. Could have gotten bad. Twilight fans(the hardcore ones) are like a cult.

Whoblehwah · « **Reply #14 on:** October 12, 2009, 05:22:18 PM »

Quote

NOT EVEN GETTING A JAILBAIT LIKE BELLA PREGNANT WITH A MONSTER THAT WILL KILL HER!!

O_O I only read half of Twillight. I think I'm gonna barrow it again just so get to this part,

.

Kid Chyllen™♪ · « **Reply #15 on:** October 12, 2009, 05:32:42 PM »

She does need help.

Lightblackheart · « **Reply #16 on:** October 13, 2009, 10:11:25 PM »

You guys don't know how the story turned out yesterday!

I found the girl in that exact shopping mall,she looked a bit down.I approached her and asked what was going on with her (I DON'T KNOW HOW IT HAPPENED....SH** CREEPS ME...I expected her to punch me in the nuts or something,but she just was looking down at the floor in a sad manner),and we talked for a while.The chick's dad died two months ago,and she just got too worked up with Twilight because of the shock of his father's death (Cancer),and she was contemplating SUICIDE,among other nasty things.

After a hour or two of talking about her life,she became my friend (WTFH dudes,WTFH...),and I am helping her too see life from another point of view,maybe help her get rid of Twilight,and introduce her to other things,like videogames

My GF is gonna help too,so,let's see how it develops and I will be quick to post it here

R.I.C.O - Twon · « **Reply #17 on:** October 13, 2009, 10:14:52 PM »

Thats a good move bro.

Lightblackheart · « **Reply #18 on:** October 13, 2009, 10:27:49 PM »

Quote from: Barack Odrama on October 13, 2009, 10:14:52 PM

Thats a good move bro.

I didn't knew what i was thinking when I aproached her,but it all ended well......I hope

ATiC3 · « **Reply #19 on:** October 13, 2009, 11:17:22 PM »

So... wait a minute... let me get this straight... you're befriending a girl.... who just went all "psycho on you" a few days ago....... Goodness of the heart... or am I just missing something.....??

Lightblackheart · « **Reply #20 on:** October 16, 2009, 05:21:57 PM »

Quote from: ATICE on October 13, 2009, 11:17:22 PM

So... wait a minute... let me get this straight... you're befriending a girl.... who just went all "psycho on you" a few days ago....... Goodness of the heart... or am I just missing something.....??

Nope.I just get well along psychos

Now,seriously,I just felt THAT SOMETHING was not right......No kidding....

Acey · « **Reply #21 on:** October 16, 2009, 06:04:18 PM »

Quote from: Rage on October 11, 2009, 04:03:07 PM

I wasnt thinking sad for her. I was thinking that this is a bit far fetched...

Swiziga · « **Reply #22 on:** October 16, 2009, 06:33:51 PM »

this story is crazy. it does seem far fetched but i can't call it a lie since weird and random things like that have happened to me before

u should be careful though( if this is true) from what i've read she could go psycho on u again

Slivern · « **Reply #23 on:** October 16, 2009, 07:23:35 PM »

Quote from: Lightblackheart on October 11, 2009, 03:42:24 PM

Well guys,I came here and other forums i am right now just to tell the epic win that was this morning.I haven't laughed so hard in my live
and apparently,the bad luck string just ended and it's just epic lols from now on

Ok,heres the thing: I went with my mom and my grandpa this morning at 6:00 AM to the new shopping mall in Caracas.We arrived around 7:15 or so.And we got separated,cuz I wanted to see the comic stores and some other like that,eat something,buy a shirt and yesh,everything you can do in a Shopping Mall.......But there was this Twitard,JUST FOLLOWING ME AROUND.She was just a nerdy type of girl,no fat,no glasses,just brakes and three freaky ponytails.She was wearing this huge blouse with "Twilight" and "Bella and Edward Forever in it".She just followed me into stores,in the restaurants,even when i went to RESTROOM!.

Then,when I didn't see her anywhere,i just went to eat a Hot Dog and then reunite again with my grandpa and my mom....But the girl just was waiting for me in a corner!!.....

She surprised me,and then shouted "JUUUUU AREEEE JJJOUUUUUSSSSTTT LIIIIEEEEEKKK EDDDWAAAAARRRDD!!1!1!1111" while she just spitted all over my face

I was about to run,but the crazy gal pushed me to the wall,all the way shouting sh** like "Do you Sparkle?!","So hot,your eyes are just like hims!","Is the Cullen Family Allright?!!!11!" and after that,he took off my back pack,and opened it,searching it all over for something.

"Don't you read Twilight?" =(

"No" I said.

And then the girl pulled outta nowhere 3 books of Twilight.And she was again spitting and blabbering all over me....And after that,the girl kissed me in the neck,shouting things like she was drain all my blood to live with her forever...

THAT WAS IT.I WAS ALMOST TO RAGE ALL OVER THE PLACE.

"Real vampire don't sparkle!Real vampires are NOT FU**ING PERFECT AND LIVE IN A LUXURY HOUSE!!.BELLA IS JUST A MARY SUE AND EDWARD TOO!!!TRUE LOVE IS NOT ABOUT BEING FOREVER YOUNG OR WATCHING OTHER PEOPLE SLEEP AT NIGHT!! NOT EVEN GETTING A JAILBAIT LIKE BELLA PREGNANT WITH A MONSTER THAT WILL KILL HER!!THE VOLTURIS (or whatever they are named,just heard the name one time) ARE A BAD EXAMPLE OF THE TROPE OF EVIL ORGANIZATION! MEYER FIRST POINT OF VIEW ITS LIKE A CRAPPY HARRY POTTER FIC!!BEING CLUMSY IS NOT A FLAW!!NOT EVEN IT!! FU** THE HELL UP!!! AND STOP STALKING ME! EDWARD IS JUST A FICTION CHARACTER LIKE MOTHERFU**ING NARUTO!!! OR HULK! OR CHARLES CHAPLIN!! SO SHUT THE HELL UP AND LET ME GO!!"

And after that,she gazed at me and broke into tears....And then she raged too...The girl started throwing me the books and shouting "Edward is real!" ALL OVER THE shopping mall.I wan as fast as I can,and one security guard stopped her,the girl started to bite him in the arm and shouting her vampire powers.

After they took her away,the lulz began.I lost almost 10 minutes of my life just laughing at the girl.Yes,I knew some fans of Twilight are extreme,but none like this one.After that,I went to pick up my back pack,I buyed some Yugioh cards in the nearby store and acted like nothing happened.

I just feel bad for the girl right now,she seriously needs Psicological help.

Twilight Vampires = UnIncredible
JoJo's Bizarre Adventure Vampires = FTW

My advice: Get a sample of Dio's blood and put it in your blood stream. Congratulations, you can now suck more blood than any vampire. EVEN TWILIGHT. And...

WWWRRRRRRRYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!

You can do that! Steamrollers included! Don't forget knives, timestops, stands, and many other things like Western references!

Anyways, what I do is...is...stay away from the Twilight fans.

Oh, and

at the Blade pic. He's an awesome vampire too.

xPreatorianx · « **Reply #24 on:** October 16, 2009, 07:44:14 PM »

of people are like that. Not just with twilight. Don't go to an anime convention in japan or locally in the states when a big high ranking anime producer/animator comes to town. It will probably end with you getting injured.

But while your story is believable why the hell didn't you get security? Rent a cops are there for a reason. She was following you all over the mall so walk right up to a security rent a cop and tell them little missy behind you is stalking you. If they actually do there job and talk to her they will soon realize how her fantasy world is being enacted in her brain. Then she will probably get taken out in a straight jacket

But seriously Im glad you are trying to help this girl but thats alittle to freaky for me. I can't say I would have done the approach you did. if she cornered me I probably would have acted out of instinct. I hate being cornered.

But some people like that just can't be changed. Like the above poster said they are basically following a cult.

DukeNukem 2417 · « **Reply #25 on:** October 16, 2009, 07:45:44 PM »

Allow me to correct your formula, Slivern:

Twilight vampires: COMPLETELY RETARDED
Whedonverse vampires: could kill Twilight vampires without blinking

Anyone who thinks Twilight vampires are cool needs to be severely beaten by Shin Akuma.

Ununsed-Username · « **Reply #26 on:** October 19, 2009, 10:05:36 AM »

Quote from: x_mad80 on October 12, 2009, 10:58:59 AM

blade is cool

ROFLMBO!
Best. Post. EVER!
THIS MADE MY DAY!

Rygelseid · « **Reply #27 on:** October 19, 2009, 11:49:54 PM »

this may sound effed up
but I make fun of the twitards at my school
just out of random too,its the only
time when Im a bit of a bully

Vault-tec Rep Høröúßøí · « **Reply #28 on:** October 20, 2009, 03:09:25 AM »

Quote from: Slivern on October 16, 2009, 07:23:35 PM

Twilight Vampires = UnIncredible
JoJo's Bizarre Adventure Vampires = FTW

My advice: Get a sample of Dio's blood and put it in your blood stream. Congratulations, you can now suck more blood than any vampire. EVEN TWILIGHT. And...

WWWRRRRRRRYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!

You can do that! Steamrollers included! Don't forget knives, timestops, stands, and many other things like Western references!

Anyways, what I do is...is...stay away from the Twilight fans.

Oh, and at the Blade pic. He's an awesome vampire too.

wait... dio's a vampire?

ItalianStallion · « **Reply #29 on:** October 20, 2009, 03:25:22 AM »

wow..

Ununsed-Username · « **Reply #30 on:** October 20, 2009, 08:31:09 AM »

Dude, that's cheesed-up man, I think it's a little far fetched, but I have some stories to that are also fudged up, so, Who knows?
*edit by poster*-------------------------------------------------------------------
----------------------------------------------------------------------------*edit*

Lightblackheart · « **Reply #31 on:** October 20, 2009, 11:16:20 PM »

Quote from: Red Ronin on October 20, 2009, 08:31:09 AM

Dude, that's cheesed-up man, I think it's a little far fetched, but I have some stories to that are also fudged up, so, Who knows?
Wait!-- To prove it to us: Get a picture of the girl holding the book like this:
G Lux: Pic removed. Dude, rule #1, go read it.
Or any odd position, and upload it on Photobucket, then I'll believe you!

Sorry,no pics,until she is sane.She musn't become Twilight-chan yet.If you want pics,I can upload some of mine burning the books for great justice.

On the Dio Brando subject...........WRRRRRRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYYYY??

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Author Topic: LOLZ A Twitard tryed to kill me this Morning! LOLZ (13+ for some language) (Read 1259 times)

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