Author Topic: The OFFICAL Chuck Norris Thread!! (Read 3848 times)

Spidermew · « **Reply #75 on:** March 12, 2010, 02:29:23 PM »

The only way to kill Chuck Norris is with Chuck Norris, to prevent this from happening, Our Chuck Norris travled the multiverse and devoured every other version of himself out there, making him: The One and Only Chuck Norris.

DARKTALBAIN · « **Reply #76 on:** March 12, 2010, 02:31:47 PM »

Scientists in Washington have recently conceded that, if there were a nuclear war, all that would remain are cockroaches and Chuck Norris.

Spidermew · « **Reply #77 on:** March 12, 2010, 02:36:11 PM »

Spiderman actualy has 8 limbs, but is forced to regrow half of them every 3 weeks because Chuck Norris views them as a delicacy and a good source of fiber

fer619 · « **Reply #78 on:** March 12, 2010, 04:44:29 PM »

Quote from: SanjiSasuke(imagine it all orange with a blue glow!) on March 10, 2010, 04:26:50 PM

Today is Chuck Norris' birthday (really)
He is -70 years old.

Chuck Norris isn't 70. 70 is Chuck Norris

Spidermew · « **Reply #79 on:** March 12, 2010, 04:53:18 PM »

Chuck Norris does not have to answer the phone. His beard picks up the incoming electrical impulses and translates them into audible sound.

Lord_Waffles · « **Reply #80 on:** March 15, 2010, 08:31:44 AM »

Chuck Norris always has sex on the first date. Always.

Spidermew · « **Reply #81 on:** March 15, 2010, 11:34:16 AM »

There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.

Lord_Waffles · « **Reply #82 on:** March 15, 2010, 02:00:04 PM »

4 out of 5 doctors fail to recommend Chuck Norris as a solution to most problems.
Also, 80% of doctors die unexplained, needlessly brutal deaths.

Spidermew · « **Reply #83 on:** March 15, 2010, 02:22:14 PM »

Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Chuck Norris

Post Merge: March 15, 2010, 02:37:59 PM

Chuck Norris has a SpiderMew tatoo that he can make appear on his chest at will

G.P.O.A - GatlingPunchRalf · « **Reply #84 on:** March 15, 2010, 03:52:08 PM »

Chuck Norris once saw a video of a match in KOF, and wondered why the sprites were doing things Chuck Norris himself could already do.

Vitamin · « **Reply #85 on:** March 15, 2010, 05:56:39 PM »

Nothing can escape the gravity of a black hole, except for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris eats black holes, They taste like chicken.

yugo05 · « **Reply #86 on:** March 15, 2010, 06:53:08 PM »

When you play Counter Strike against Chuck Norris, The "esc" button doesn't work. No one can escape Chuck Norris.

Lord_Waffles · « **Reply #87 on:** March 16, 2010, 08:28:10 AM »

When Bruce Banner gets mad, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad, he turns into Chuck Norris.

Spidermew · « **Reply #88 on:** March 16, 2010, 08:30:37 AM »

As an infant, Chuck Norris' parents gave him a toy hammer. He gave the world Stonehenge.

G.P.O.A - GatlingPunchRalf · « **Reply #89 on:** March 16, 2010, 06:42:46 PM »

Earthquakes only occur when Chuck Norris looks down.

SanjiSasuke · « **Reply #90 on:** March 16, 2010, 08:11:45 PM »

Quote from: vitamin555 on March 15, 2010, 05:56:39 PM

Nothing can escape the gravity of a black hole, except for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris eats black holes, They taste like chicken.

It must be duely noted that Chuck Norris has discovered that the statement cannibals made that people taste like chicken is confirmed. However cannibals taste like beef.

Vitamin · « **Reply #91 on:** March 16, 2010, 10:13:25 PM »

The meteor didn't kill the dinosaurs, Chuch Norris did!

DARKTALBAIN · « **Reply #92 on:** March 17, 2010, 12:45:26 AM »

When Chuck Norris talks, even E.F. Hutton listens

Spidermew · « **Reply #93 on:** March 17, 2010, 11:49:00 AM »

The opening scene of the movie "Saving Private Ryan" is loosely based on games of dodgeball Chuck Norris played in second grade.

yugo05 · « **Reply #94 on:** March 17, 2010, 08:45:13 PM »

I love this topic!

Chuck Norris doesn't believe in God, but God believes in Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his father.

Chuck Norris can encircle his opponents.All alone.

Since Chuck Norris lost his wedding ring , it's a real mess in the middle earth.

G.P.O.A - GatlingPunchRalf · « **Reply #95 on:** March 17, 2010, 09:55:30 PM »

Quote from: yugo05 on March 17, 2010, 08:45:13 PM

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his father.

Chuck Norris can encircle his opponents.All alone.

Since Chuck Norris lost his wedding ring , it's a real mess in the middle earth.

Chuck Norris doesn't get scared. Because the only thing Chuck Norris is afraid of having noone to kill.

Spidermew · « **Reply #96 on:** March 18, 2010, 09:09:21 AM »

Chuck Norris does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will simply change the actual spelling of it.

vyn · « **Reply #97 on:** March 18, 2010, 11:58:22 AM »

Earthquakes and Hurricanes are just Chuck Norrises farts and sneezes.

Spidermew · « **Reply #98 on:** March 18, 2010, 12:09:43 PM »

Chuck Norris once worked as a weatherman for the San Diego evening news. Every night he would make the same forecast: Partly cloudy with a 75% chance of Pain

~Hale "R@CE" Caesar~ · « **Reply #99 on:** March 18, 2010, 12:19:38 PM »

R@CE 45 doesn't patch Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris patches R@CE 45!!!! Mmmmmmm patches!!!!!

News:

Author Topic: The OFFICAL Chuck Norris Thread!! (Read 3848 times)

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